Jun 1, 2011

Slow Churned + Rich & Creamy + Double Fudge Brownie + Ice Cream = Healthy?

I always get a good guffaw out of marketing mush companies spend millions $$ to dole out. 

Does anyone remember the KFC commercial a few years back advertising fried chicken as a healthy alternative to burgers?  In the ad, a fit wife hurls a 12-piece bucket of fried legs and breasts at hubby as a smooth voice-over announces the vat o' fat slots in nicely with a healthy diet.  I nearly sprayed 1% milk out my nostrils the first time I saw it.  The FTC fielded phone calls and KFC pulled the ad a few days later.  

That campaign was about as believable as Lindbergh stuffing his pants with a humongous diaper while skimming the Atlantic.

Which brings me to stuffing my food hole tonight.  I noticed this label on the back of a container and was proud of the sheer amount of healthiness and lifestyle and Edy-ness I was basking in:





Continue rotating the package and you come to this unholy mess:

 
Pray tell, how is plunging your face into a half gallon bucket of slow churned rich and creamy double fudge brownie ice cream supporting a healthy lifestyle?  What's next, fried Twinkies attack free radicals and pork rinds eradicate butt pimples and back fat? 

-Beard

2 comments:

  1. Ice cream has milk, therefore it's dairy. Chocolate is made from beans, therefore a vegetable. Brownies are made from flour (wheat), eggs (protein), butter (dairy again), chocolate (again, a vegetable). One can justify the "healthiness" of anything that comforts you...and ten bucks says a woman was in charge of the marketing campaign on that bucket of Double Fudge Brownie.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I like Christine's line of thinking, right on!

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for the note, check back for my response!